God Didn’t Ask Me to Erase My Culture. He Refined It

There was a season in my life where I quietly believed I had to choose. Choose between my culture and my faith. Choose between being Chinese and being Christian. Choose between honoring my heritage and honoring God.

I never said it out loud, but deep down, I wrestled with the fear that parts of me were “too ethnic,” too different, too foreign to fully belong in the spaces I was walking into. So I learned how to shrink. I learned how to make myself more digestible. Less traditional. Less expressive about my roots. Less connected to where I came from.

I stopped talking about certain customs. I stopped wearing certain things unless it was “appropriate.” I stopped embracing the fullness of my identity because somewhere along the way, I thought holiness meant becoming culturally empty.

But God never asked me to erase who I was. He asked me to surrender what was sinful. Not what was cultural. There’s a difference. And for a long time, I didn’t know how to separate the two.

Growing up, I lived in between worlds. Too Chinese for some spaces. Too Western for others. I knew what it felt like to carry generations inside of me while also trying to survive modern identity. I knew what it felt like to be called “different” before I even understood myself.

I carried the silence of my ancestors. The resilience of immigrant bloodlines. The discipline. The honor. The pressure. The survival mentality. The emotional restraint. Some of it protected me. Some of it wounded me. And when I came to Christ, I thought maybe all of it had to die. But God, in His gentleness, began showing me something deeper. He does not destroy identity. He redeems it.

The Bible never says God only speaks through one culture. In fact, heaven itself is multicultural. Scripture says every tribe, every tongue, and every nation will worship before Him. Not erased. Not stripped of identity. Not forced into sameness. But unified in worship. The Kingdom of God was never meant to look culturally flat.

God is not intimidated by heritage. He created nations. He created languages. He created traditions, artistry, storytelling, food, music, and family structures. What He confronts is idolatry. What He refines is pride. What He heals is brokenness.

But refinement is not erasure. And that changed everything for me. I started realizing that some of the very things I tried to suppress were actually gifts. The discipline my culture taught me? God could use it for stewardship. The honor and respect I was raised with? God could refine it into humility and wisdom. The resilience passed down through generations? God could turn it into perseverance.

Even the deep value of family and legacy within Chinese culture began to make more sense to me biblically. Scripture constantly talks about generations. Legacy. Family lines. Inheritance. Wisdom passed from elders to children. That’s Dynasty. That’s Kingdom. That’s KNg Dynasty. Not perfection. Not performance. But refinement through God while still honoring where you came from.

I think sometimes people assume becoming “holy” means becoming disconnected from culture altogether. But I’ve learned that when culture is surrendered to God, He purifies what is broken and preserves what carries beauty, wisdom, and truth.

I no longer feel ashamed wearing hanfu. I no longer feel disconnected from my bloodline. I no longer feel like I have to dilute my story to fit into spaces that were never built to understand me. Because God Himself authored my story. Chinese. Woman. Mother. Believer. Creative. Builder. Daughter carrying generations.

None of that surprised Him. And honestly, one of the most healing things God ever taught me was this: I don’t have to become someone else to be used by Him. I just have to let Him refine me. There’s a difference between refinement and rejection. Gold is refined because it’s valuable. Not because it’s worthless. And maybe that’s where some of us are right now.

Trying to erase pieces of ourselves because we think God can only use us if we look like everyone else. Sound like everyone else. Worship like everyone else. Express ourselves like everyone else. But the Kingdom was never built on carbon copies. It was built on redeemed people. People from different nations. Different testimonies. Different histories. Different cultures. All pointing back to one King.

I want my daughter to know that following Jesus does not mean abandoning where she comes from. I want her to know she can love God deeply while still honoring her heritage. I want her rooted spiritually and culturally. I want her to understand that identity becomes dangerous only when it replaces God—not when it reflects His creativity. Because culture can be a vessel. A vessel for storytelling. A vessel for legacy. A vessel for remembrance. A vessel for worship.

And I believe God is raising up people who no longer feel forced to divide themselves in order to belong. People who can carry Kingdom and culture with wisdom. People who understand that refinement is holy, but erasure is not the assignment. So no, God didn’t ask me to erase my culture. He refined it. And through that refining, He taught me how to finally walk fully as myself.